Million Dollar Cowboy Page 25
The ringing of a cell phone jarred them both.
His eyes widened. Still, he did not say a word. Showed no emotion. He might as well have been a sea sponge for all she got out of him.
“You’re ringing.” Kaia nodded.
“I swear to God,” he muttered, his voice low and buzzy as a rattlesnake’s tail. He pulled the cell from his pocket. “I’m going to throw this damn thing away.”
At the shift of topics, Kaia felt as disoriented as a first-time surfer clobbered by a big ocean wave, sputtering, coming up for air, grasping for her bearings. She gulped. Smiled.
“Promises, promises,” she quipped, trying to keep things light, deeply grateful for the interruption.
He glanced at the screen, grimaced. “It’s Vivi.”
At his ex’s name, jealousy rose up in her throat. She had nothing to feel possessive over. Yes, she loved him. But Ridge was not hers.
“The surgeon has been by to see Duke,” he said. “They’ve released him.”
“That’s great news.”
“Vivi wants me to fly him home.”
“Of course.”
He looked as if he were going to say something, but then pressed his lips together, bobbed his head. Got to his feet.
She was both relieved and disappointed. She remained seated, fearful that her legs weren’t strong enough to support her weight. She’d laid her heart bare to him and he acted as if nothing had happened. She still had no idea how he felt or where they stood.
“Go on.” She made shooing motions.
He hesitated, his gaze meeting hers again, but she took a page from his book, iced up her eyes. Detached. Disengaged. Disconnected.
“Get out of here.” Her voice came out like gravel, spiky and rough. “Go now.”
Before I fall to my knees and humiliate myself by begging you to stay.
Kaia loved him?
Ridge’s heart was a whirligig in a sandstorm.
Blistered. Battered. Beat up.
He stood perched in the doorway, gazing back at her on the sofa, warring with his desire to stay and the hot fear telegraphing panicked messages through his nerve endings.
Her declaration left him shocked, stunned, blown away.
Not just because her story was far-fetched, unbelievable, loony flipping tunes … but because he ached to believe it was possible.
In truth, he felt it too. Love for her as big and bright as the sun. So bright that if he stared at her for too long he’d go blind.
And that’s what scared him.
The intensity. The overwhelm. The loss of control. The terror that if he dared to let himself fully love her, and then he somehow lost her, it would be the end of him.
No one had ever told Ridge they loved him before.
Oh, he supposed his mother had, but he couldn’t really remember. Duke wasn’t prone to words of endearment, and none of Duke’s wives had said it. Sabrina and Lucy had had kids of their own, and well, Vivi …
As for the women he’d dated, Ridge had always gotten out of the relationships if he got the slightest inkling that they were falling for him. But usually, he was careful to pick women who wanted to keep things casual.
Until now.
Until Kaia.
He opened his mouth to tell her he loved her too. But he’d never uttered the words out loud before, didn’t know how to start.
It hit him then, and he knew why he couldn’t wrap his tongue around, I love you. He was too damn broken for Kaia. She deserved so much better. She deserved someone who knew how to love with all his heart and soul. Someone who could and would put her ahead of everything else.
And Ridge just didn’t know how to do that. Work was the only thing that had ever saved him. If he didn’t have his work, he had no idea who or what he was.
“Go on,” she said. “Your family needs you.”
Still, he hesitated. Torn in two. Desperate for her, but committed to putting her needs before his own. If he told her he loved her, she would surrender herself to him one hundred percent—heart, mind, body, and soul.
It was a precious gift he had not earned.
She was so loving and generous and he could ruin her so easily.
“Later,” he said. “I’ll come back.”
She nodded, but her face was pale, dark shadows under her eyes. “Later.”
He met her gaze, sent her all the love he was feeling in that glance. “I will be back,” he said firmly. “We’ll talk this through.”
“Okay.” She smiled a gentle smile, soft and full of sadness. A smile that said she didn’t believe him.
Not for a second.
Chapter 26
After Ridge left, Kaia was devastated. She’d given him her heart on a platter and he had rejected it.
We’ll talk this through.
Those four words gave her hope. But was it false hope? Was she stupid to keep holding on?
One thing was for sure. She would make herself crazy with second-guessing if she stayed here by herself. She had to get out of the house.
Aimlessly, she drove by Tara’s place, trying to decide if she should confide in her most nurturing sister. She spied Aria’s and Ember’s cars parked in her driveway and pulled in.
Tara answered the door on her second knock.
“What’s up?” she asked.
“We’re planning a welcome home dinner for Archer and Casey for Monday night. C’mon in.”
“How come I wasn’t invited to the powwow?”
“We thought you had plans with Ridge.” Tara ushered her into the living room, where her sisters were seated on the sofa, glasses of wine on the coffee table in front of them.
“Why would you think that?” Kaia said.
“Aria saw you with him at the dog clinic.”
“You were there?” Kaia shot her youngest sister a look.
“I stopped by to see if you wanted to come hang out with us, but you and Ridge looked pretty cozy, so I backed off.”
“Sounds like you two are working things out,” Ember said, and patted the cushion beside her. “Come sit down and tell all.”
“Nothing to tell,” Kaia denied, but she sat beside her sister. “Ridge was helping out at the dog clinic. That’s all. After Duke’s heart surgery and the complications of the last two weeks, he is finally getting out of the hospital fifteen days after he went in. Ridge left to go pick him up and fly him home.”
“When I took a peek, Ridge was rubbing his chest all over yours,” Aria snickered. “What was that about?”
Wisely, Kaia chose to ignore her.
“Want a glass of wine?” Tara asked, waggling the bottle of chardonnay that was almost empty.
Kaia raised a hand, wished she’d kept driving. Apparently she was in the hot seat over Ridge. Had Ember blabbed about the Song of the Soul Mate? “No thanks, I’m good.”
“Don’t be shy because it’s almost empty. Aria brought two bottles.”
“Oh?” Kaia shifted the attention to her youngest sister. “To what are we drinking?”
“I got a job,” Aria said.
“Congratulations!”
“Thanks. I’m jazzed!”
Tara left the room and came back with the second bottle of wine, a corkscrew, and a glass for Kaia. Even though she didn’t want the wine, she accepted the glass. She would be polite and toast her sister’s new job, but then she’d be on her way.
“Doing what?” Kaia asked.
Aria grinned and tossed her head. “I’m working for Vivi.”
“Huh? In what capacity?”
“As a wedding planner. At Archer’s wedding, we got to talking. Archer and Casey had hired an outside wedding planner, and Vivi realized she was losing money by not including wedding planning along with the venue. But she can’t do it alone, so she asked me if I’d be interested since I have a degree in public relations and, I quote, ‘have a bubbly personality.’”
“Good luck,” Kaia said.
Aria wrinkled her nose. “What does that mean?
”
“It means good luck.”
“You got a look on your face. It means something more.”
“Pay no attention to my face,” Kaia said. “I’m soured on Vivi because of the way she treated Ridge, that’s all. I’m sure you’ll love working for her. She’s lucky to have you. Not only do you have a bubbly personality, but you’re passionate about things that interest you. I can see you making a success of this.”
“That means a lot.” Aria grinned.
Sadie, a sassy Siamese that Kaia had coerced Tara into adopting last year, sauntered into the living room to see what was going on. Kaia’s heart melted the way it always did whenever she was around animals.
Her sisters all ignored the cat because they knew if you went to Sadie and tried to pet her or pick her up when she wasn’t ready, she would nip with her sharp little teeth. But if you waited and let her come to you, then you’d be rewarded with purrs and cuddles. Generally, Sadie’s affections were random, unless Kaia was in the room.
“Watch how Kaia seduces Sadie,” Aria whispered. “We’re deep in conversation and without even being consciously aware of it Kaia started moving her fingers the minute Sadie appeared. Slow little scratching motions.”
“Huh?” Kaia blinked.
“You’re doing it now.” Tara nodded. “You’re scratching the leg of the couch.”
“Yep,” Ember confirmed. “Slowly, lightly, intriguing Sadie. Calling her to you without drawing attention. And here I thought you emitted some kind of magical, come-to-me allure.”
“You think that’s how she got Ridge wrapped around her little finger?” Aria teased.
Ha! As if. The reverse was true. He had her wrapped around his pinky.
Kaia stared down at her hand, felt the texture of the wood beneath her fingers. She should stop scratching. Deflect her sisters’ attention. But then Sadie moseyed over to check out Kaia’s fingers.
“Watch,” Aria said. “She’ll move to scratching the cushion.”
“How long have you been observing her technique?” Tara leaned in, clearly fascinated.
“I can’t do it now with you all staring at me.” Kaia snorted.
“Go on.” Ember waved a hand. “Show us your cat luring techniques.”
“I didn’t even know it was a technique,” Kaia said. “It just comes naturally.”
“Like Ember’s red hair.” Aria took a sip of wine.
Ember patted her curly locks. “Thanks to Mom’s Irish DNA.”
Sadie put her paws on Kaia’s soft cushion, studied her scratching fingers with fascination. After a moment, she swished her tail and leaned in to sniff Kaia’s fingers.
“Wait for it,” Aria said. “Wait for it …”
Everyone watched Sadie.
The Siamese hopped delicately into Kaia’s lap.
“Boom!” Aria pumped a fist. “And there you have it, the secret to Kaia’s cat magic. The reason Sadie likes Kaia best is not just because she loves cats, but because she also understands them.”
“Too bad those skills aren’t transferable to men,” Kaia lamented, rubbing Sadie behind the ears.
Sadie immediately started purring and the contented rumbling reminded Kaia of the romantic rumblings inside her own head when she kissed Ridge.
Kaia inched her fingers along Sadie’s spine, thought of the way Ridge had stroked her in much the same way. Realized that in their relationship, he’d been the one holding the mesmerizing magic, and she’d been the one seduced.
Complicated feelings swirled inside her, and suddenly she wanted nothing more than to be home alone.
“I’ve got to head out,” she said, transferring the Siamese to Tara’s lap. “Let me know what you decide about Archer and Casey’s welcome home dinner. Just tell me what to bring.”
“Hey,” Ember hollered as Kaia started across the living room. “You never did tell us what’s going on between you and Ridge.”
“Nothing,” she said. “There’s nothing to tell.”
Then as quickly as she could, she headed for the door. How could she tell them something she did not understand herself?
Since the Evektor was a two-seater, it was just Ridge and Duke on the flight home. Ranger was driving Vivi back from El Paso. Remington and Rhett had already returned to their lives, once they knew Duke was out of the woods.
Ridge couldn’t decide which was tenser, being alone in the plane with Vivi, or his father. The flight took an hour, but it felt ten times longer than the three-hour drive.
Duke’s color was ashen, and he’d lost a good twenty pounds during the two weeks he’d been in the hospital. He kept wriggling around in the seat.
“Are you okay?” Ridge asked.
“Can’t get comfortable.” He grunted.
“You can let the seat back.”
Duke fumbled with the seat, cursed. “Too many buttons. Stupid thing. Why did you have to buy such a fancy plane? Show-off.”
Ridge took a deep breath and let it out slowly. His father was feeling frail and powerless. That made him grouchy. Ridge wasn’t going to get sucked in.
Finally, Duke settled down, fell asleep, and snored all the way back to the Silver Feather. Ridge counted his lucky stars.
But then that left him alone with his thoughts. All he could think about was Kaia and that look on her face as he walked out the door.
And the story she’d told him. About the humming she heard in her head when he kissed her. Song of the Soul Mate she’d called it. The fable wasn’t sane or rational, but he believed her. Believed she believed it anyway.
He wanted to believe it too.
What a terrific notion. That fate played a hand, and that the love of your life was predestined and all you had to do was find her.
Trick was, he had found her, but he wasn’t worthy of her.
He’d trained himself not to feel anything. Feelings messed with your mind. Got you in trouble. He could be distant, self-contained, emotionless, and yes, he knew, hard to love. That’s the way he’d always wanted it.
Until Kaia.
Now here she was, giving him a giant case of the feels.
When it came to Kaia, he was neither distant nor emotionless, let alone self-contained. All he wanted was to fuse with her, meld into her body, make her his forever and ever.
The very thought of being with her blazed a fire of burning desire through him so all-consuming that it left room for nothing else. He didn’t care about work. He had more than enough money to last a lifetime. The desire to best his father had completely disappeared. All he felt for the old man was pity.
So go to her. Tell her that.
His pulse quickened at the prospect. But it had happened so fast. He felt crowded. Claustrophobic. Terrified.
It was nearly dark when they landed. Almost nine. Ridge came around the side of the Evektor to help his father out.
“I’m fine.” Duke swatted at Ridge. “I can walk. I ain’t no cripple.”
“No, but you’ve been in bed for two weeks.” Ridge took his arm anyway, dodged the next swat. “You’re weak.”
“Like you give a shit.” Duke snorted. “You’re only here because you feel guilty.”
Ridge tamped down a sigh. Would it always be like this between them? “You got that wrong. I don’t feel guilty about a damn thing. I’m here because I’m your son and you need help.”
“Oh yeah? If you’re such a great son, where have you been for the last ten years?”
“I’m as good a son as you are a father,” he retorted.
“Hmph.” Duke grunted, but stopped fighting to pull away.
“Yeah, that’s right. Even Steven.”
He got Duke into the house, but when he tried to direct him to the bedroom, Duke balked. “I wanna go to my office.”
“It’s nine o’clock at night.”
“So what? I need to get back in the saddle.”
Ridge knew when to pick his battles. This was not the time to buck the old man. “Okay,” he said, and guided Duke
into the office Ridge had been using, just as Phil Rhonstein phoned for their nightly conference.
He left Duke in the office and went outside to take the call.
“How are things today?” he asked, looking up at the wide expanse of stars, feeling the full impact of the night sky. The majesty of it still took his breath away. “We any closer to getting this sewed up?”
“Things are …” Phil hesitated.
“What?”
“Stalled.”
Ridge jammed a hand through his hair. “What’s the holdup?”
“Liu Yan,” he said, referring to the Beijing silver mine owner, “is suspicious because you’re not here. He thinks we’re trying to pull something over on him. Now he’s hired a new team of international lawyers to comb through the contract again. We’re in wait mode.”
His chest knotted up, and fangs of frustration sank into him. Honestly, he hated not being there, not being in control of the negotiations. Ridge huffed. “My dad’s out of the hospital. He’s doing better. Give me three days and I can be in Beijing.”
“That’s not necessary.”
“Yes it is. I should have been there from the beginning. Billions are at stake.”
“I know, I know,” Phil said. “But we can work things out on this end. Stay put. Look after your father. You’ve got enough on your plate.”
The last thing he wanted was to linger in Cupid when his Beijing deal was going to hell in a hand basket.
Well, except for Kaia. He would go see her before he left. Talk things through. Make things right so that when he came back from China in six months …
What? You’re going to ask her to wait six months for you? How fair is that?
“There’s nothing more important than family,” Phil said.
Yeah, maybe for Phil, maybe for most people, but not for Ridge. In his entire life, the only people he’d been able to truly count on were the Alzates.
“Tell Liu Yan I’ll be there on Tuesday,” Ridge told Phil.
“What the fucking hell!” Duke’s voice boomed from inside the house. “Where are you, you snot-nosed sonofabitch?”
“What was that?” Phil sounded alarmed.
“Family.” Ridge sighed. “I’ll call you later. Tell Liu Yan, Tuesday. I’ll be there for sure.”